September 03, 2009

Jenna Morasca... WTF?!

Originally posted on on 3/13/09.

Jenna Morasca… WTF?!

by FK9


NASHVILLE, Tenn., March 9 /PRNewswire/ -- Jenna Morasca, the sole survivor and million-dollar grand prize winner of the CBS reality series "Survivor: The Amazon" in 2003, is headed to the six-sided-ring on Total Nonstop Action (TNA) Wrestling's "TNA iMPACT!" this Thursday night at 9 p.m. ET/PT on Spike.

Morasca has pursued several avenues in the entertainment industry since winning $1 million on "Survivor," and has now set her sights on TNA. Vying to be the newest addition to the TNA family, Jenna will first have to meet with hardcore wrestling legend and current TNA Executive Shareholder Mick Foley. The question will soon be answered of whether Jenna can handle herself inside the six-sided ring as well as she did in the Amazon.

-Press release.

What is this?

Seriously… what the hell is this?

Is it some kind of joke? Because I’m not laughing.

Had the Knockouts division not fallen far enough lately with the pushes of idiots like Rhaka Khan? Did they really need to subject us to this too? What in God’s name for?

Let me rephrase that… I understand WHY TNA is doing this. It’s the latest in a long line of ill-conceived publicity stunts to garner the company some mainstream press just like the Pacman Jones thing and the Sarah Palin thing and the Rob Blagojevitch thing and the Danny Bonaduce thing. But how many publicity stunts does this company need?

I know that in the mind of Vince Russo any publicity is good publicity but this is simply not true. In hindsight, was David Arquette winning the WCW championship good publicity? Was Team Pacman good publicity? Lord, no.

At least with the Sarah Palin invitation TNA was offering her money to give to charity. And I think the Palin publicity stunt has been one of the stupidest things TNA has done in the last few years, but this is even worse because at least Daffney is a wrestler. What exactly is Morasca? She posed for Playboy once upon a time and she was on Survivor 6 years ago. And this qualifies her to join the TNA roster HOW exactly?

And the part that makes me want to scream is that Morasca has stated that she intends to get in the ring and mix it up once she’s had a “crash course” in wrestling. A “crash course”? Either Morasca or TNA management is very confused and I honestly don’t know which.

Apparently, it has not yet dawned on Morasca that being properly trained to wrestle is not something you can do over the weekend. It takes months to get the basics down and at least a year or two before you have enough experience to get to a point where you really know what you’re doing. What exactly is she going to be doing on iMPACT in the meantime? Is she going to be like Karen Angle where she’s in our faces, sucking up TV time every single week when there isn’t a single legitimate reason for her to be there at all?

WWE Diva, Kelly Kelly, was brought into the business the exact same way; someone in management thought she was hot so they signed her and threw her on TV untrained and completely unprepared. To the shock of absolutely no one, she was God-awful. I still have a good laugh whenever I recall the night she tried to execute what was quite possibly the worst handspring elbow in the history of wrestling. She’s been in the business for a couple years now and has only recently progressed to the point where she’s barely competent as an in-ring performer.

Does this sound at all familiar? Is this what you plan on doing with Morasca, TNA? Do you realize that this completely destroys the way you branded the Knockouts division in the first place? You market them as women who are wrestlers, who are serious competitors, not Divas -- as women who actually take the word “Diva” as an insult. And then you sign someone who embodies everything these women are supposed to be against all in the name of a cheap publicity stunt.

The Knocked Out DVD that TNA released last year is full of interviews where the Knockouts talk about how they take a lot of pride in the fact that TNA really respected their women’s division by only hiring accomplished and experienced wrestlers to compete in it (granted, Rhaka Khan and Christy Hemme slipped through the cracks somehow, but still…). Signing Morasca is like a huge slap in the face to all those women.

You know that commercial SpikeTV airs advertising the Knockouts? The one with lines such as, “We don’t settle grudges with pillow fights!” and, “Bikinis and lingerie? Screw that!” and, “No Divas here!” How exactly does some chick from a reality show and Playboy fit in with this group?

One of the most infuriating things about the TNA product last year was how the entire Knockouts roster was often forced to play second fiddle to the endless Karen Angle soap opera tripe despite Karen not being a wrestler and being completely devoid of any actual talent. Are they now going to have to play second fiddle to some vapid bimbo from Survivor?

TNA, Gail Kim is laughing her ass off at you right now.

And quite frankly, I don’t blame her one bit.

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